at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
