Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
