But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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