They should really pass out barf bags in church
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
