"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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