Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
time to smoke my breakfast
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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