worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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