Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
