I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
