More tranny stories later!
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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