her vagine was all disorganized.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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