i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
