I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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