And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Randomize
