So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
