And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
