he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
