My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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