Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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