apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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