piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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