My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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