giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
