I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
