Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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