I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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