Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people http://tfl.nu/1coi
  Replies (52) Good night (1824) Bad night (1515)
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (308): It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low http://tfl.nu/rfi4
  Replies (25) Good night (2146) Bad night (919)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle. http://tfl.nu/34ph
  Replies (64) Good night (1274) Bad night (3253)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song. http://tfl.nu/ltnq
  Replies (47) Good night (1080) Bad night (5202)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned. http://tfl.nu/n40z
  Replies (57) Good night (7494) Bad night (1827)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work. http://tfl.nu/q42i
  Replies (33) Good night (6055) Bad night (3093)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already http://tfl.nu/bq9r
  Replies (19) Good night (1516) Bad night (3643)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless. http://tfl.nu/hrpm
  Replies (15) Good night (3030) Bad night (1639)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in... http://tfl.nu/1w40
  Replies (8) Good night (4081) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in http://tfl.nu/jhp8
  Replies (6) Good night (3268) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so. http://tfl.nu/nluj
  Replies (7) Good night (3509) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (441): View more from Bermuda-Carib

  You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (441): You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only. http://tfl.nu/b5c7
  Replies (2) Good night (1928) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night. http://tfl.nu/v9wx
  Replies (0) Good night (1214) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!" http://tfl.nu/823i
  Replies (0) Good night (480) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night! http://tfl.nu/mal7
  Replies (0) Good night (482) Bad night (296)

Randomize