I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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