he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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