your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
