I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
