Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
