He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby