My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize