is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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