If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
only you would photoshop your dick
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
