she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
