i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
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