ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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