would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize