If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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