I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
