It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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