Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize