no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
