I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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