who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
