Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
