My first STD was from a foam party
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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