New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
