we're blogging at a bar
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
